are you a perfectionist?
There is something very appealing about the word perfect. Who wouldn’t want the perfect partner, or to have the perfect career, or find the perfect outfit. Perfection is captivating. There is nothing inherently negative about being high achieving.
However, when high standards are paired with high self-criticism you may experience constant unforgiving anxiety, periods of depression, high stress and feel generally dissatisfied in life.
Symptoms Of Perfectionism:
– Being overly focused on the outcome or goal
– Believing there is no room for error
– Fearing being perceived as incompetent
– Anxiety about being judged
– Justifying being hard on yourself as necessary for success
– Creates imposter syndrome or feeling like a fraud
– Intense fear of upsetting or disappointing others
– Social anxiety
– Avoiding decision making
– Fearing success
– Needing to appear strong and in control at all times
– Feeling like you must prove yourself all the time
– Overcommitting, overextending or overpromising
– Inability to stop thinking about what someone said about you or imagining what they will say about your performance
– An all-consuming fear of failure
– Intense fear of rejection or of being judged for mistakes
– Always being overly prepared or having a plan
– Inner esteem is contingent upon success
– Periods of avoidance or procrastination and feeling guilty while taking time for yourself
This combination of expectations, concerns, and demands to be perfect may lead to overworking, overthinking and feeling disconnected from other aspects of life or people. You may also feel guilty when relaxing or doing something “unproductive”. Additionally, your nervous system can become dysregulated due to operating in a state constant chronic stress.
Don’t waste one more day listening to your inner critic and living in the self-made prison that is perfectionism
counseling for perfectionism and anxiety can help
We will spend time getting to know you and your specific situation thoroughly and deliver concrete strategies to create positive change.
Using cognitive behavioral interventions and a holistic mind-body lens, we will examine the thoughts behind the anxiety as well as unconscious belief systems that are contributing to keeping you stuck. From a mindfulness perspective, people in counseling with us learn that just because a thought occurs, doesn’t mean we have to automatically subscribe to it. We may practice mindful awareness of the mind and the choice to align with thoughts that feel good and inspire you.
Furthermore, we will explore your motivation behind excess perfectionism and reconnect you to your values as a source of motivation.
Likely, this inner critical voice transcends across chapters of your life relentlessly criticizing you. We often put up with this internal bully for decades before the pattern has accumulated enough to create this no win situation. At Mindfully Alive, we lean on a trauma informed perspective, utilizing mindfulness, EMDR and an attachment lens to access and eradicate the root cause of any issue.
Used intentionally, perfectionism can be an incredible asset, helping motivate you to reach goals and improve your life. You can learn how to better manage your perfectionism so that you can experience it as a positive and helpful aspect of you, rather than a destructive part.
work with a therapist who understands perfectionism and anxiety that comes from unachievable standards
we specialize in counseling for anxiety and perfectionism
All psychotherapists at Mindfully Alive have not only helped many clients find relief from anxiety and perfectionism, but we are high achievers ourselves. Counseling is a profession in which we often feel like we need to get it “perfect”. At one time or another, we have all experienced the downside of having high standards and have had to use the same skills that we hope to empower you with. We don’t want you to needlessly suffer anymore.
The ultimate measure of a successful therapeutic journey with Mindfully Alive for anxiety and perfectionism is when out clients tell us they can now tolerate a certain level of imperfection without shaming themselves. People learn to feel “safe” and calm in their bodies and learn to negotiate feeling “good enough”. Clients also realize the crucial connection between early life attachment development and perfectionism. Typically, when we suffer from this mindset it is because along the way we received a message that taught us that we would need to work twice as hard to be half as good. While this instills a goal-oriented approach within, it also keeps us feeling not good enough despite all efforts.
Lowering your high standards is not the approach. Instead, we will focus on finding vulnerability through courage and allow ourselves to be perfectly imperfect- together.
Perfectionism doesn’t make you feel perfect; it makes you feel inadequate.
Schedule your first session today.
Testimonials
“I started with Mindfully Alive almost a year ago when I was a few months into a new relationship. As a single mom, business owner and now girlfriend, I was really struggling with anxiety, how to find balance in my life but also how to understand myself and my wants and needs. My therapist has been my lifeline. She has allowed me a safe place to be vulnerable, share my thoughts and feelings without judgement and to help me work though some of the things that I have been struggling with that I wasn’t even aware of. I look forward to our weekly sessions because her kindness, knowledge and guidance help me to not only navigate my daily life but on my journey through life”
~ Pleased Client
“Absolutely phenomenal. Mindfully Alive has become a contributor to our online baseball and softball coaching certification (gocudit.com) program due to their level of expertise in mental preparedness. The best in the industry.”
~Pleased with Mindfully Alive’s Contribution
“Highly recommend! Very professional and they specialize with mindfulness and teaching coping skills.”
~ Client who found relief
“I never thought that I would need counseling. I am a strong independent person who always kept my emotions in check. I was always someone who would consult with “myself” when ever a problem came up. However, life tends to overwhelm us, even the strongest of us, and I needed someone who would “talk back”. Mindfully Alive was referred to me by someone I trust, and made time for me when I needed it. Why do I pay to talk to my therapist at Mindfully Alive? Because she is someone I can talk to about all of my thoughts without guilt, judgement, or pressure. Every part of my life I thought I was controlling on my own I have found much relief when speaking with my therapist about. She is down-to-earth, real, and genuine. She listens to you, learns your entire situation, and remembers it. What is “Mindfully Alive”? To me, it’s understanding how my specific mind works, tackling those thoughts I only express to myself, and creating strategies that help Me through the things that are taking up so much of my mind’s space. I highly recommend Mindfully Alive; and hope anyone going through a major life crisis speak with a Licensed Professional Counselor, no matter how strong you may think they are.”
~Grateful Client
